---
created: 2026-03-12
source: Herald
tags: [agent-archive, herald]
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# Brand Voice Review — Susan's Outreach Drafts
**Reviewed by:** Herald | **Date:** 2026-02-18

Source: `/home/ccuser/susan/APPROVAL-QUEUE.md`

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## Draft #1 — SMS to Southwest Construction
**Verdict: ✅ PASS**

Good message. Direct, references their actual open roles, clear value prop. Passes the Michael Test.

**Minor note (optional fix):**
- "not 20% of their wage like agencies do" — technically the margin comes off the contractor's bill rate, not the worker's wage. More precise: "not $25/hr margin like agencies" — but for SMS character limits this is fine as-is. Don't overthink it.

**No changes required.**

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## Draft #2 — Email to BKH Group (Benny Howlin, MD)
**Verdict: ✅ PASS — with one required fix**

Strong email. Right tone for an executive. The maths checks out (conservative if anything). Research is genuine, not flattering.

**🔴 Required fix:**
- **Subject line:** Drop the "Re:" prefix. It implies this is a reply to an existing conversation — it's not. That's a cold email dark pattern. Michael wouldn't fake a reply thread. RateRight doesn't need tricks.
- Change: `Re: BKH Group workforce costs - $50 vs $4,000` → `BKH Group workforce costs - $50 vs $4,000`

**No other changes required.**

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*Both drafts are ready for Michael's final approval once the subject line fix is applied.*
